


Ok but why not wrestle a gorilla?

by AnimeVampire



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: (very inaccurate kung fu but still), Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Awkward Kageyama Tobio, Bisexual Hinata Shouyou, Crack, Depression, Experimental Style, For fun :D, Friendship, Funny, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Hurt Hinata Shouyou, KAGEYAMA TOBIO IS VERY BAD AT FEELINGS, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, Karasuno, Kung Fu, Light Angst, Minor Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu, Multi, No Sex, No Smut, Oblivious Hinata Shouyou, Random - Freeform, Romantic Friendship, Romantic Soulmates, Slow Burn, Soulmates, Weekly Updates, comments give me life, or else it’s just me experimenting w writing and it’s not weird at all, slow burn I think?, soft, who knows - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-09-30 16:13:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17227223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimeVampire/pseuds/AnimeVampire
Summary: Most people try to avoid making their soulmate feel pain.Hinata thinks his soulmate will hate him, so he proceeds to do a ton of reckless bullshit.Alternatively titled: “Who needs 10 fingers anyways?” or “Everyone’s gay and can’t deal”





	1. A Curvy Lecture And Confusion™️

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t know if this AU already existed, but I was inspired to use it by THIS Kyouhaba fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4811354
> 
> Also just FYI I have like 0 writing experience so this probably sucks balls, I’m just writing to write cause apparently that’s how u get good

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to my shitfest!! This is just for fun, so don’t expect too much :)  
> I’ve been quite inspired for writing this lately, but don’t be too surprised about inconsistent updates lol. I’ll try to write pretty frequently though!

Hinata had always adored the idea of soulmates- Having someone made especially for you, who would always get along with you and they would be happy together and there’d meatbuns and kittens and probably a rainbow, was a dream. Of course, he knew there wasn’t REALLY such thing as rainbows before he got to grade school, and not long after he learned that soulmates weren’t everything that he imagined, either.

It’s late afternoon when Hinata, Izumi and Kouji walk into their health class. The room is uncomfortable in a way that’s hard to describe- It feels too curvy, kind of, there’s never quite enough cold and even though the lightings fine, the atmosphere is dim. It tastes like sawdust, and it’s all scrunchy and too BOOM and not enough DING and it’s just begging Hinata to take a nap.

The lecture doesn’t help either. The professor is just so BLAND and the material is BORING, how is he supposed to pay attention when he could be outside? He tries to listen, seeing as he’s stuck in this musty building whether he learns or not.

“Soulmates,” says the nameless professor, “are a significant subject in most specialized medical fields. However, it’s also essential that you as an individual have adequate knowledge about how to proceed in the year that follows meeting your soulmate. As you all know, for that year you will feel your soulmates pain, and your soulmate yours. If your pain receptors aren’t active for you, it’s much easier to cause permanent damage to your body, and cause the single person that means the most to you tremendous pain. That’s why it’s very important to be careful with your actions during this time period. 

“The vast majority of society has exactly 1 soulmate of the opposite gender, so we’ll be covering dealing with that situation over this coming unit. Therefore, we’ll be separating into groups of boys and girls, to discuss what sorts of pains you might encounter after meeting your one and only.” The professor had the gall to wink.

It was ugly. Many children’s innocence was lost that day.

(This was mostly because of the contents of the lesson, but still. The wink was just the icing on the cake.)

(Also, why “the icing on the cake”? Cake doesn’t have icing, it has frosting. Unless it’s a sad, wimpy cake that doesn’t have any friends because they have poofy colorful joy and all that THIS cake gets is lame sugar water and all the other cakes laugh at him and lick each other’s frosting off because they have frosting and he doesn’t and anyways why is it a cake? Cake is amazing and should have nothing to do with atrocities like this and-

The bell rang.

“Why was the class period so short?” asked Izumi. “And why were we talking about soulmates? Literally everyone knows this stuff, all you need to do is be careful for a year. Why a whole unit?”

“Because it makes for good exposition,” Kouji said blandly.

Izumi’s face went red. “NO IT DOESN’T, THAT’S AWFUL EXPOSITION! IT’S WAY TOO LAZY!! RAISE YOUR STANDARDS, KOUJI! YOUR STANDARDS!!”

“Guys, shut up!” Hinata cut in, to the relief of the hall filled with baffled students “I realized some stuff in health class today. Isn’t this whole soulmate system kind of lame?”

The bystanders become even more confused.

“I mean, I get wanting to fall in love with a girl. Girls are cute and stuff. But who wants to deal with period cramps? And I think my soulmate might hate me because I’m so clumsy. She would get hurt all the time!!”

This incredulity knows no bounds.

“Is a girlfriend really worth it?”

The hall is filled with gasps.

Kouji and Izumi are white faced.

After a full 10 seconds of radio silence, Izumi fills the gap.

“Couldn’t you just do more things you want to if you’re so sure your soulmate will hate you anyways?” Hinata tilts his head, confused. “I mean, I wanna be on good terms with my soulmate and get married and have kids and stuff, but you could juggle knives and go parachuting and stuff and not need to worry about the pain! Worst that can happen is you loose a finger or something, and even then, you don’t really need all 10 of them. You’d be fine!”

Hinata’s eyebrows rise on his face, his mouth gliding upwards until he launches himself into the air.

“Nevermind, soulmates are great!!!”

******

Middle school progressed without incident. Well, that wasn’t quite true, it’s MIDDLE SCHOOL, it really sucked, but nothing unusual happened. Hinata practiced his spikes alone, and felt the bruises he got when he got hit in the face with the volleyball. It happened more often than you might think.

One interesting thing does happen- Kouji meets his soulmate at the start of their second trimester, an unassuming girl named Izumi who he enjoys immensely. Hinata and (the other) Izumi teased him about his infatuation and the shared name constantly- Whenever they’re not whining about how he’s ‘So lucky, I wanna meet my soulmate too, it’s no fair! I bet mine’s cuter than yours though, HA HA!’ 

Kouji wants to die.

******

“Izumi, Kouji!” Hinata calls. “Oh- Not you, Izumi 2.” That’s another thing that annoys Kouji: EVERYONE calls his girlfriend Izumi 2 and he doesn’t know what to do about it.

“What, Hinata?” he asks, expression bordering on a glare.

“Would you guys please play volleyball with me in the tournament? I’m getting tired of bugging you about it.” 

“Maybe,” Kouji says, frown deepening, “you could take a no for a no! Did that ever occur to you?”

Hinata tilts his head, considering. “Not really… But I don’t like that idea so it doesn’t matter. Come on, PLEASE? It would be sooooo cool!!”

Kouji steps forward, glaring for real this time. “No way in-”

“Fine.” Izumi sighs fondly. Seeing Kouji’s bewildered glare, he whispers loudly. “Think about how much it means to him. And it’s only a couple hours of our day- We’ll probably loose in the first round anyways, and then we can go home. No skin off our backs to humor him.”

Hinata, somehow missing the obvious stage whisper, leaps into the air. “YAY! We’re gonna be AWESOME! I’ll go like BAM, and the ball will go FWOOSH and the crowd’ll be all like AAAAAAAH and the other team will go AUUUUUUGH!!! And then it’ll be all WHEEEEEE! Thank you guys so much!!!!”

“See?” says Izumi. Try as he might not to, Kouji really does see. 

The tournament might even be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave any criticisms in the comments- I’d love to hear where I can improve. And also, it just motivates me to write if I know people care what the fuck I’m doing.
> 
> Have a wonderful day!!


	2. Hinata swears he doesn’t do drugs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People worry for Hinata

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m pretty happy with this chapter, hope you guys enjoy!

The bus pulls up to a huge school- Much bigger than the one Hinata goes to!!

They walk through the hallways- The ceilings are so high!!

After getting lost twice (so many different ways to go, it’s confusing!) the makeshift team makes it to the gym. Hinata sniffs… Deeply.

“The scent,” he says, voice filled with blatant awe, “of Air Salonpas!!!!”

“Don’t say stuff like that,” Kouji says gruffly. “They’ll think we’re country hicks.”

He doesn’t notice that they are, indeed, country hicks.

Behind him, the team exchanges glances, conversing with their eyes. Should we tell him? they ask, apprehensive. No, don’t. It’s ok. It’s not hurting anyone that he thinks we’re actually cool headed, smooth operators.

“But it’s so big! I’ve never been in a gym this big before!!” Hinata calls out.

Only to be bumped into by a very tall, very scary radish.

The radish glares.

Hinata cowers, and promptly moves aside. The scary team passes them, with a glaring boy at the back.

“Hey Izumi,” Hinata says out of the side of his mouth, “why does that one kid have a cloak? Is he cosplaying?”

Izumi is confused. “None of them are wearing robes, Hinata… Are you sure you saw one?”

“Yeah, it was all red and swoopy!” he exclaimed.

“Hinata,” Izumi says, “you’re starting to worry me. You know that my older brother’s in medical college, right?” Hinata nods enthusiastically. “Well, ever since we were little, you’ve noticeably suffered from nausea & sudden onset of diarrhea. If you add visual hallucinations, the most likely explanation is viral gastroenteritis- But that’s literally just the flu, and it’s been chronic, so if it was that then you also have some sort of immune dysfunction. That seems unlikely though, there would’ve been other adverse effects. Another likely candidate is cocaine abuse, that matches much better. Have you been consuming cocaine, Hinata?”

“No!! Why would I be abusing cocaine? The only unhealthy thing I’ve had in the past month is brownies!”

Izumi pales. “What kind of brownies?”

Hinata startles, then gapes a little. He looks like a fish, his lower lip is really weirdly curved and it’s actually kind of disturbing.

“WHAT KIND OF BROWNIES, HINATA?” he yells.

“RASPBERRY FUDGE SWIRL. WHY DO YOU CARE?”

“NO, NOT THE FLAVOR, IDIOT- WHERE DID YOU GET THEM?”

“I MADE THEM WITH MY SISTER, OF COURSE!! NOT EVERYONE CAN AFFORD STORE BOUGHT BROWNIES EVERY WEEK!”

“Thank fucking god,” Izumi sighs. “Wait- You didn’t put anything weird in them, did you?”

“Like what?” Hinata asks, bursting with innocent curiosity.

“Let’s just say, hypothetically, some sort of white, powdery substance.”

“Oh, yeah-

“WHAT”

“We always use flour, it’s important for brownies! I can give you the recipe if you want?”

Another sigh. “No, Hinata, that’s ok.”

“Are you sure? You seem really interested in these brownies…”

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Izumi says, “just forget about it.”

A referee walks over. “Excuse me, you 2, but I’m going to have to ask you to stop yelling or you’ll be escorted off the premises. And you- Yes you, the short one- Take this card.” He slips a white card with neat black writing into Hinata’s hand, then walks away. Hinata stays standing, shocked.

“He called me short.”

Izumi sighs. (He’s already sighed too much for a week in just the past 10 minutes, why does this idiot make him so TIRED?) “You are short, Hinata.”

But Hinata doesn’t hear this cold, cold truth- He’s too busy clutching his stomach, face turning a frankly alarming shade of blue and if he isn’t on drugs then what IS wrong with him? He’s obviously not okay.

“I need to go to the toilet,” he moans, and hobbles out the door.

******

This is bad, this is really bad, he REALLY needs to get to the bathroom, he won’t stop for anyth-

“Yukigaoka? I’ve never even heard of them. They’re all so short, like grade schoolers! We won’t even have to try, so lame.”

“Take that back!” says Hinata, stopping. “I may be short, but I can jump!! Don’t underestimate us!”

The asshole (he’s wearing a Kitagawa Daichi uniform and oh wow he’s tall isn’t he? And he’s even got cronies, that’s so cliche who even DOES that anymore?) leers at him. “Oh yes, you’re very sca-“

GROOOOOOWL

“I’m sorry,” Asshole says, “but are you okay? Your stomach sounds awful, do you need to go to the bathroom?”

“Shut up, I’m fine!! Don’t be so caring, you’re the bad guy!” Hinata is angry, his eyebrows wobbly and poorly controlled but it looks like he’s at least TRYING to look annoyed.

“If you’re so fine, then what’s that card?” He startles, and realizes that he never actually read the card.

‘Got a drug problem? Call the 24-hour Narcotics Anonymous helpline  
XXX-XXX-XXXX’

Hinata is shocked. “What? But I don’t do drugs!!”

Asshole looks really concerned now. “The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem. I know it can be hard, but at some point you’re going to realize that the way you’re living isn’t sustainable. It’s better to learn this now than later.

“And I know that a complete stranger isn’t who you should be hearing this from- Hell, you probably don’t even like me- but something needs to change, Shrimpy. If you start your recovery, you can get your life together. You might not see it right now, but there’s a future that’s just waiting for you to burst in, healthy and ready to conquer the world! If you need proof, just look at my sister. She started drinking when she was just 13, and it spiraled from there. She took drugs, and started having casual sex as well, all to take her mind off of our awful home life. Her darkest time was-

“First years! Stop fraternizing with the enemy!!” The glaring boy from before, no longer clad in a cloak, is stalking over. He looks angry.

“You were supposed to be grabbing energy drinks! Why are you 3 so easily distracted?”

“My bad, ‘Your Highness’. But let’s be real here, do we really have to do all of this stuff to prepare for a match against some no-name high school? Caffeine can be really detrimental to growth and I want to get taller, and I’m not sure I’m comfortable with having 2 energy drinks before every match…”

Your Highness seems to consider this for a minute. “If you’re really that uncomfortable with consuming caffeine, bring it up with the coaches. But don’t you dare go easy on this team just because they’re hillbilly nobodies! If we don’t play our best, even losers like them might defeat us. Now go bring those energy drinks to the team.” He glares again, then turns to walk away...

...But there’s no way Hinata’s just gonna let that happen. “HEY- Your Highness! Don’t rule us out just yet!! We’re going to beat you, and then beat the next team, and then the next one after that, all the way to nationals!!”

“My name isn’t Your Highness, twerp, it’s Kageyama. And you’re wrong.” He steps closer, looming over Hinata. “WE’RE going to beat you, and all the teams after, until we get to nationals.” And Kageyama swiftly stalks away.

Izumi pokes his head around the corner. “Hinata, why were you getting into fights with scary guys? You were supposed to be going to the bathroom!!... And is your stomach okay?”

Hinata’s expression deepens into something vaguely serious. “It’s all better.” And he walks back to the gym.

Izumi is left lurking weirdly behind the boys bathroom, adding to his profile of Hinata’s symptoms.

“Maybe that’s just the way he is,” he says to himself, and sighs one last time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Narcotics Anonymous: (636)-647-8406  
> Raspberry fudge brownie recipie:  
> http://supermancooks.com/raspberry-swirl-brownies/  
> Next time, the games begin C:<


	3. (Un)comfortably numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something is Wrong™️- The Chapter

20 minutes before their first match begins, the Yukigaoka team starts warming up, trying to get acquainted with volleyball over too little time. Hinata spikes, and it’s amazing having someone actually toss for him, it really is, but the touch feels hollow somehow, emptier… Numb. It seems disconnected, somehow, when his hand hits the ball, like it isn’t really happening at all.

“Hinata? Are you alright? You’re usually much more… Energetic, or fiery or something,” one of the first years comments.

“Hm? Oh, yeah I’m fine, it’s nothing.” He returns to spiking, and pushes his queries to the back of his mind. He was never good at thinking anyways- The day of the match his whole LIFE had been leading up to wasn’t a good time to start.

The whistle blows, and both teams face each other, one determined and one cowed. But Hinata scowls with a fierceness rare for him, and leads his team into battle. 

The ball is served, and the carnage begins  
And it doesn’t stop  
They just keep losing  
and it feels wrong  
they might loose but  
this doesn’t feel  
like it’s his  
his hands are  
his but they’re not  
responding  
they should hurt  
he should  
hurt  
why doesn’t it hurt  
this can’t be  
happening  
his  
hands  
are  
silent  
and  
they  
can’t  
feel  
WHY  
isn’t  
he  
feeling  
WHY  
is  
it  
so  
empty  
they  
cAnt  
LooSE  
it’s  
noT  
SOLID  
HE  
CANT  
FEEL  
THE STING  
OF  
A  
SPIKE  
THE POUND  
OF  
HIS  
FEET  
AND  
ITS  
W R O N G  
S O W R O N G  
HIS HANDS  
ACHE  
BUT NOT AT THE RIGHT  
TIME OR  
PLACE  
ITS  
LIKE  
THEY’RE  
ONLY  
PRETENDING  
THEY  
BELONG  
TO HIM  
WHY DO  
THEY  
LIE

Why

are

his

hands

LYING

?

 

******

Kageyama receives.

He tosses.

The others hit (they’re slow, still to slow, KEEP UP, you can be so much better).

He scores.

It repeats methodically. He’s detached, he feels nothing. Although they need to try, this team is making the points easy to take. If they keep pushing at full strength, they’ll win the game in no time.

But…

Why do his hands ache so damn much?

******

Something is off.

Hinata should be sunshine incarnate right about now. Even if they’re losing, even if it’s not quite how he dreamed, they’re playing volleyball on a real court with real people. Kouji knows how important that is to Hinata- He had to turn him down practically daily for ages. He should be glowing, encouraging his kouhai, leading them proudly even in defeat.

But he’s not glowing- Quite the contrary. Where he usually shines, he’s dull, and his eyes are… Wild, somehow, frenzied. 

This can’t be good.

“Hinata…” Kouji says, after a particularly brutal point for Kitagawa Daiichi, “I know you said you were okay earlier, but are you sure? You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Hinata startles, eyes sharpening from the glazed desperation they’d been swathed in to something clearer. “No, it’s nothing… It just feels wrong. Too numb.”

Kouji’s eyes widen. “That’s obviously not nothing, Hinata. Do you think you need a break?”

“NO!!” Kouji steps back instinctively, admonished by the sudden change in tone. “No… I can’t stop. This is what I’ve been waiting for, I can’t stop, I can’t.”

“Ok,” he says, still obviously concerned. “As long as you take care of yourself, Hinata.”

******

They lose.

It’s painful. It still feels off balance.

But he’ll be ok. He’ll take care of himself, and he’ll make himself ok.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time- Hinata and Kageyama are idiots.


	4. I’m not crying, YOU’RE crying, shut up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata is sad :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! Hope you enjoy this chapter!!

Hinata was still numb as he left the gym with his team, everything still felt sort of surreal and floaty and his head was buzzing but not his whole head, it was an incessant rattle that vibrated in his teeth and he didn’t like it. But he ignored it, and thanked his kouhai for playing as he bade them farewell. 

He kept his smile up, and he didn’t break. Not when they lost the game. Not when they lined up, opposed to Kitagawa Daichi. Not when Izumi and Kouji asked after him. Not when they walked out of the school, defeated. Not- Until...

Until 

HE was there.

******

After everything, Hinata really should’ve expected to see one Kageyama Tobio leaving the school. His body moves by instinct, bringing him to talk to the so-called King.

“YOU!!” Kageyama startles at the deafening shout, but it served its purpose- He saw Hinata, acknowledged his existence.

“If you’re the current King of the Court, then I’ll overthrow you!!! And I’ll be the one who gets to stand on the court the longest!!” There were tears in his eyes. They splashed his arms, little pockets of cool in the summer heat. That didn’t mean he had to acknowledge them, though. He didn’t say they could be there, so they weren’t.

He should’ve expected that Kageyama wouldn’t just accept this rivalry, he really should’ve.

He didn’t, though.

“What have you been DOING over these past 3 years?”

It hurt.

“You have speed, but your technique is laughable. You need to be STRONG to qualify as a rival.”

It really hurt.

“But you’re not strong. You’re not strong at all!”

He. He can’t deal with this right now. Today has been exhausting, he doesn’t want this.

So he walks forward.

“Maybe if you had actually put some eff- Hey! Are you walking away from me? Get back here, you dumbass!!”

Hinata just kept walking, until Kageyama’s shouts were just an echo in the back of his head

******

His mother picked him up from the school. Her brows came together, forehead wrinkling with concern, but she didn’t say anything.

They rode home in silence.

******

After dropping Hinata off at the house, his mother brought Natsu to get groceries.

Finally, once he was alone, he let himself cry. Authentic, consensual tears.  
It was the oddest thing, people always say that you plaster a smile on, but Hinata had always pretended by forcing himself to feel how he wanted to appear. He was grateful and quietly happy until the others left. He was angry at Kageyama. Then, he let himself process his emotions so that he could move on with his life, and not be left perpetually exhausted.

So in the privacy of his bedroom, no one watching but the ratty stuffed bear sitting on his bed, Hinata cried. It was better than smiling- It felt liberating, therapeutic, to let raw unfiltered emotion flow out of his eyes, out of his being until he had released it all, no evidence of his distress but the salt on his cheeks.

He washed his face, drank some water, and picked up the issue of Shonen Jump from last January that he still hadn’t gotten to reading.

And he smiled for real this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: SOULMATE STUFF!!!!


	5. The obligatory Gay Crisis™️

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata learns something important about himself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for y’all! Hope you enjoy it!!!!

In retrospect, his mom definitely left him alone intentionally. Hinata’s moods changed with the wind, and were about as subtle as elephants. Large, pink elephants, blowing air horns while riding skateboards. She knew he needed to be alone, have some time to bounce back from the defeat.

And once he did that, THEN she could grill him.

“So, Shouyou, how was the tournament?” she asked, smiling faintly, eyebrows raised.

Hinata frowned, sipping the pineapple smoothie she made for him earlier. “It was bad. I mean, it was great because it was a TOURNAMENT,” (he flailed his arms in an attempt to capture some abstract idea of just what that signified), “but… Everyone thought I was on drugs, and we lost and that was bad, and it just all felt WEIRD.”

“We’re going to go back to the drug thing,” she said, narrowing her eyes slightly until Hinata nodded frantically, “but for now, what do you mean by weird?”

He slurped his drink. “Well, it was all NUMB when I was hitting the ball, like my hand was only pretending.”

His mother nodded, used enough to his expressions that she understood the meaning with little effort. “And,” he continued, “it still feels kinda off. My body doesn’t feel how it’s supposed to.” He slurped harder on his smoothie, savoring the taste.

“Stop giving your soulmate brainfreeze, Shouyou- Oh, come on, I JUST got that carpet, don’t spit your smoothie all over it!”

“Sorry Mom,” he said automatically. “But- me— SOULMATE? Why? And who is it?”

“Why would I know who your soulmate is? All I know is that you just described what having a soulmate feels like. Your body is used to constant, little aches and pains. Like how your back is sore when you stand up after sitting down for a long time, or your feet stinging if you run, or pinpricks when your legs fall asleep. But now, your SOULMATE is feeling even those little things, and you’re getting theirs. That’s why you felt off- You had pains, but not the right ones.”

“Ohhhhhhhh,” Hinata said, understanding. “Then- That- Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

“But Shouyou,” his mother continued, “that’s not the most important part. Do you have any idea who your soulmate could be?”

Hinata scanned through his memories as thoroughly as he could. He really wasn’t good at remembering things, so it was spotty at best, but-

“It was definitely someone at the volleyball tournament, I would’ve noticed something off earlier if it wasn’t. Hmmm…” He trailed off as he scoured his mind for anyone he could see himself falling for. “I didn’t really talk to any girls there… There was that one manager that I made eye contact with, though! Maybe it was her!!”

“No, you need to either touch each other or talk to each other to activate the bond. Shouyou,” she said, ever so gently, “you know you can tell me anything, right?”

“Huh? Yeah, of course! Why are you mentioning this now?” 

And at that moment, Hinata’s mother had a revelation that completely turned her perception of her son upside down.

Ever since Hinata was a child, he was a hopeless romantic- Always obsessed with soulmates. He had his fair share of puppydog crushes, they never went anywhere. She’d watched him stutter around girls, seen him staring at the boys on the basketball team as she picked him up from school. But this- This changed everything.

Hinata didn’t know he was bisexual. He was THAT fucking dense.

There were a few ways that she could handle this. She could gently ask Hinata how he felt about boys, poke and prod until he reached that point on his own… But honestly, he didn’t have enough self awareness for this method to have a high rate of success. She could ask him if he was bisexual, but if he didn’t know that already it would only result in sputtered denials. So, really, she had no choice.

“Shouyou,” she said, “you fucking ADORE boys, you dumbass!”

And of course, he just HAD to spit out his smoothie again. The things she has to deal with.

******

Hinata’s world turned on its axis until it aligned with his past experiences with a sharp click.

“Well, fuck,” he said, shocked.

“LANGUAGE, Shouyou,” his mom admonished, blatantly ignoring that she swore at her son just 30 seconds ago.

“But wait- Then is my soulmate a girl or a boy??”

“It could be either,” she replied carefully, “but since you met them in a room jampacked with sweaty teenage boys, I’m gonna go ahead and guess that it’s a boy. Was there anyone there who you think might have been your soulmate? Someone you felt an immediate connection with?”

Only 1 person came to Shouyou’s mind. “It must be… ASSHOLE! The first year, who was under the King!! Oh, mom, he was so nice! He was really concerned about my drug problem, even though I was a stranger and didn’t have a drug problem!! And he’s just so supportive and kind and he MUST be the one!”

“Well then, we better track him down,” said his mother, greatly amused. “Does this ‘asshole’ have a last name?”

“Oh, no, I don’t really want to find my soulmate right now. Can we ignore that this happened, and locate him later if I change my mind?”

“I’m ok with that, but why wouldn’t you want to find your soulmate?”

“It’s just an idea Izumi had, don’t worry about it,” he said hastily. “So… how bout that weather?”

Over the years, Hinata’s mom had to learn to pick her battles. She decided to let this one go, in favor of another topic.

“Not so fast, young man- We’re talking about this drug thing!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And they talked, and it was awkward.
> 
> So, I’m not sure what I want to do next! I had 2 options in mind: Either do Kageyama’s childhood the way I did Hinata’s, or move on to high school. Which would you guys rather see? Or is there something else you’d like better? Leave your thoughts in the comments!!


	6. Kung Fu Doorswing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> High school starts and Kageyama is Not Okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the long wait! I really meant to update more often than this- I just started a couple of new fics that stole my attention. It’s their fault, not mine!! (They’re both Haikyuu, check em out if u want)
> 
> On that note, I’m gonna try to get this onto a weekly update schedule, so next chapter will be put on Friday!! Now take my angst:

The summer wasn’t as dangerous as Hinata wanted it to be. Not that he was suicidal, or anything! He just wanted to do all the interesting things he wouldn’t be able to once the year was up!! But his MOM thought that he was being “reckless” with all of the things he proposed. For instance:

“Hey, mom, mom!!!” Hinata was bouncing on the halls of his feet, exuding joy & vitality.

“What is it, Shouyou?” she asked, well prepared for whatever he said to be idiotic in nature.

“LOOK!!” He shoved a flier in her face, and she turned. Sheet. White. Because even HINATA shouldn’t be this stupid.

_TEST YOUR STRENGTH!  
Think you can conquer a natural predator? Always wanted to challenge the wild?  
WRESTLE A GORILLA!  
7 silverback males await your challenge! Winners can boast their strength to friend and stranger alike!  
(Company not to be held accountable for any injuries. Release must be signed before participation. Learn more at www.StupidDare/slvgor.ja) ___

__“...”_ _

__“Mom? Hey, Mom, are you all right? Why aren’t you saying anything?”_ _

__“...Shouyou.”_ _

__“Yes, Mom?”_ _

__“WHY.”_ _

__Hinata was confused. “Whadaya mean, why? It’s WRESTLING a GORILLA, Mom, there isn’t a why. You just WANT to!!! And I wouldn’t feel a thing!! It’s the opportunity of a lifetime!!! And see this?” He gestured to the big red letters at the top of the paper. “It’s for a limited time only. We gotta do it now!!!”_ _

__“Do you have a guess about how I’m going to reply?”_ _

__“...Yes?”_ _

__“NO, Shouyou, I’m not going to let you wrestle with a gorilla.”_ _

__“But moooooooooooom, it’d be so cool!!”_ _

__“No!”_ _

__******_ _

__By the time high school rolled around, all Hinata managed to do was go zip lining, hike a mountain, and gotten a green belt in kung fu. He wanted MORE- And he was running out of time, too!!_ _

__But those concerns were forgotten as he stepped into Karasuno High, in favor of the thing that would ALWAYS be at the forefront of his mind: Volleyball!_ _

__Over the summer, he played even more than usual in an attempt to acclimate to his… Painlessness? That’s a word, right? Anyways, he’s gotten used to it for the most part, the numbness where sensation should’ve been was familiar. It was a shame though- Not feeling the sting of your hand on a killer spike takes away some of the satisfaction. Still though, spikes are GREAT and he couldn’t WAIT to be on the court!!!_ _

__His knee jostled restlessly all through the day. The clock moved at like a tenth of the speed it usually did- The universe was definitely conspiring to make him suffer and wait as long as possible to play. It was _stifling _at his cramped little desk, and no one was even talking about anything interesting or important!! Just expectations for the class! EVERY SINGLE HOUR!!! If he’s gonna have to sit in school, he should at least be _learning_ something. But noooooo. ___ _

____FINALLY, the bell rang. Hinata leapt to his feet, slinging his bag over his shoulder. There were bodies shoving towards the door, all trying to get out first. He wouldn’t let them._ _ _ _

____Hinata planted his feet and closed his eyes. Time slowed as he felt the energy the other students were letting off, wafting away en masses with even the simplest movements. _What a waste.__ _ _ _

____He moved his _qi_ to his feet and jumped high, using someone’s shoulder to vault over the crowd. Upside down from the force of his ascent, he hooked his legs over the open door. He hung for a moment, feeling the shocked energy of his peers. _Foolish children.__ _ _ _

____Hinata finally opened his eyes and oH SHIT THE TEACHER WAS GLARING._ _ _ _

____He flipped himself off of the door and skulked swiftly away._ _ _ _

____A mad dash through the halls, dodging people using his newfound kung fu skills, found Hinata the first person to enter the gym._ _ _ _

_____It has nets, and balls, oh god it’s PERFECT!_ His hands are cold, but that doesn’t matter, nothing could be better than this moment! _ _ _ _

____His opinion changed when the door swung open._ _ _ _

____And the King was on the other side._ _ _ _

____The thoughts rushed in, thoughts like ‘wrong’ and ‘empty’ and ‘failure.’_ _ _ _

____This isn’t how it was supposed to go._ _ _ _

____“Why are YOU here?!” He put all the anger he had felt that day, all of the panic and trauma into those 4 words, and the King…_ _ _ _

____He backed away._ _ _ _

____******_ _ _ _

____Over the summer, Kageyama began to grow accustomed to random pains. For a couple of weeks, his knuckles had near-constant twinges of discomfort. One day, his legs became so sore he could barely walk. And his palms always, always stung in that very particular way they do after a good spike._ _ _ _

____Of course he realized it was his soulmates fault- He wasn’t STUPID. But… There was no way to know who it was. All he could do was keep going._ _ _ _

____(He could find out who it was. He could storm into the house of every person he played against at that tournament, he could demand his soulmate revealed themselves… But why would they listen? Why would they ever accept him? He learned the hard way that no one liked him, that no one could trust him. How could someone like THAT have a soulmate?)_ _ _ _

____(As the months passed and no one came looking for him, he knew he was right.)_ _ _ _

____He kept practicing. Practice was normal, practice meant everything was okay, practice meant he wasn’t alone and confused and dealing with emotions he couldn’t handle._ _ _ _

____(If he tossed a little lighter than usual, no one needed to know.)_ _ _ _

____Summer passed in a blink of tears and denial, until finally school started again. He didn’t get in to Shiratorizawa._ _ _ _

____(If he cried over more than just the failure when he got the letter, no one needed to know.)_ _ _ _

____Karasuno’s volleyball team used to be great, they said, it used to be one of the best. Now it was mediocre._ _ _ _

____(Mediocre was good, normal. He could try to match.)_ _ _ _

____The hours ticked by. Professors talked. He didn’t listen. The voices let his thoughts fade out._ _ _ _

____(He knew he should be feeling more. He knew he should be doing better. He can’t.)_ _ _ _

____When the last bell rang, he opened his eyes (did he close them? He couldn’t remember) and picked up his book. He put it in his bag. He picked up his pen, and put it in his pocket. He zipped his bag. He stood up, and walked out of the classroom. _Left, right. Left, right.__ _ _ _

____The hallway was packed with people, pushing and shoving to get out. “You- Tall boy, with the dark hair!! Kid- Glaring kid!” Kageyama finally looked up, meeting the eyes of a very tall teen. “Would you like to join the basketball club?”_ _ _ _

____He shook his head mutely, and continued on his way._ _ _ _

____Finally, he reached the gymnasium. The door wasn’t cold on his hand as he pushed it open._ _ _ _

____(He barely noticed any more.)_ _ _ _

____He certainly noticed when THAT boy, the one with the squandered talent and fiery hair, the one who broke in front of his eyes…_ _ _ _

____Was there._ _ _ _

____Why was HE there?_ _ _ _

____He opened his mouth, no idea what words he’d form but needing to break the silence somehow. Over the years, he’d forgotten how much he hated it. But before he could speak, the boy cut in._ _ _ _

____“Why are YOU here?”_ _ _ _

____His voice was made of hate. Kageyama had barely even spoken to the boy._ _ _ _

____He broke everything with his presence, didn’t he?_ _ _ _

____He wasn’t wanted. He was never wanted._ _ _ _

____So he walked away._ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: The senpai get involved!

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment if you don’t mind, it honestly makes my day :D  
> I’m gonna try to update this every Friday, so stay tuned!


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